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Youth activists sit in at Mitch's office. The number one reason they do it, according to a study of high schoolers, is to improve their relationships. Nearly all the girls I interviewed were bright, assertive, ambitious. Afterward, he never mentioned the incident again, so neither did she.

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Although they took satisfaction in a task well done, the pleasure they described was never physical, never located in their own bodies. Yet nearly every girl I spoke with had at least one experience with a boy who had tried, despite her clear refusal, to coerce or force her into oral sex. Another young woman, a freshman at a New England college, told me that she performed oral sex for the first time shortly after her sixteenth birthday. Federally mandated abstinence-only programs, which began in the early s, not only reinforced that intercourse was the line in the sand of chastity, but also, using the threat of AIDS as justification, hammered home the idea that it might well kill you. The concern with pleasing, as opposed to pleasure, was pervasive among the girls I met, especially among high schoolers, who were just starting sexual experimentation. He was very aggressive. Anna had grown up in a politically liberal family and attended progressive private schools through twelfth grade.

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She said no, and he backed off, only to try again a few minutes later, and then once more shortly after that. The result is that while their rates of intercourse and pregnancy have dropped over the past thirty years, their rates of sexually transmitted diseases have not. The rise in going down among straight couples, the authors wrote, was the biggest sexual change of the twentieth century. I never liked the idea of oral sex again after that. Another young woman, a freshman at a New England college, told me that she performed oral sex for the first time shortly after her sixteenth birthday. Federally mandated abstinence-only programs, which began in the early s, not only reinforced that intercourse was the line in the sand of chastity, but also, using the threat of AIDS as justification, hammered home the idea that it might well kill you. Normally the next thing would be the bra comes off.

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